The Bible does not tell us much about Joseph – the man whom God had chosen to be the earthly Father of His Eternal Son.
When Mary told him (that conversation is not recorded in scripture), he did not believe that what she said was true. He did not believe that the angel Gabriel had appeared to his Betrothed, and he did not believe that her condition was due to a divine visitation of the Spirit of God.
Mary may have told him about the angel appearing to Zachariah – and that Zachariah and Elizabeth were expecting a baby (“Who’s the father of that one?” Joseph may have asked with incredulity.) If she did . . . he didn’t believe that story, either.
Joseph and Mary were not yet married . . . they were somewhere within the year-long betrothal period. The two were more than likely the subjects of an arranged marriage (arranged my their parents or by Joseph himself). Proposals had been made in an official manner by the arrangers and an agreement had been settled upon in the presence of their Synagogue Rabbi in Nazareth.
A year was designated for the purpose of proving moral purity . . . and to prepare for the wedding ceremony and the life together that the ceremony would launch.
In Joseph’s day a betrothal was much more than an engagement . . . yet less than a marriage.
It was a legal, moral, and spiritual binding. The couple would be under the scrutiny of each other, their families, their Synagogue, their Rabbi, and their entire community for one year. Joseph and Mary would live exemplary lives during the year preceding their marital union, to prove that they were obedient to the laws of God in the matters of physical and spiritual purity (sexual abstinence).
The word troth (pronounced like the verb clothe – he was clothed all in blue) still makes its appearance in modern wedding ceremonies. “I plight thee my troth!” It is an old English pronunciation of the word truth.
I pledge to you my truth.
Mary was Joseph’s betrothed . . . his true and loyal one.
Joseph was Mary’s betrothed.
However, from all natural appearances . . . Mary had broken her vow of betrothal . . . she had been untrue . . . unfaithful . . . without faith.
But Joseph was not without faith in God . . . he was only without faith . . . in Mary.
He must have been devastated.
He might have been angry.
He most certainly was disappointed and hurt.
But Joseph cannot be faulted in this story at all.
His faith in God is never questioned . . . as a matter of fact, the whole story is a testimony to his great devotion to his God. When GOD told him to believe (through his Messenger) . . . he did . . . without question or hesitation.
Does God expect you to believe in ME?
As a part of your commitment to Him . . . are you expected to be committed and dedicated to ME?
No.
You and I are so often unworthy of the faith of others.
I am not expected to believe you . . . or believe IN you . . . unless God tells me to.
I can plight my troth to you willingly . . . if God instructs me to . . . if God leads me to.
I can marry someone . . . and dedicate my faith and faithfulness to them . . . if it is what God wants.
But my faith is ultimately in HIM . . . not in YOU.
All ideal marriages are made in Heaven. That means that marriage is an institution created by God . . . and only He can rightly pair people off for matrimony.
Me . . . marrying Terri Beth Evans . . . was God’s plan . . . before the idea ever occurred to me or Terri. We were made for each other. God drew us together . . . led us to believe in each other . . . and to pledge our truth and faith to each other.
A part of the great sin that precipitated the Old Testament Flood was that “the Sons of God looked at the daughters of men and saw that they were beautiful; and they chose the ones that they wanted to be their wives.” (Genesis 6:2). Men who were believers in the One True God (Sons) chose mates who were merely the daughters of men (not the Daughters of God) on the basis of their physical beauty. Men were choosing wives that they wanted . . . but not the wives that God wanted for them.
Joseph had promised his faith and faithfulness to Mary because he believed that was what God wanted him to do. He believed in God’s choice for his mate.
Mary made the same promise to Joseph . . . for the same reason.
Joseph may have never questioned God in this serious calamity, but he probably doubted that he had correctly discerned God’s will for his life. Somehow he had believed in the wrong person. Most certainly it appeared that the person of his trust had wronged him and broken trust by committing immorality.
In Joseph’s eyes, Mary was not guilty of Adultery, since they were not married . . . but she was guilty of Fornication. Both were great moral sins involving the breaking of God’s Law concerning sexual purity within and outside of the bonds of marriage.
Matthew calls Joseph a just man. (Matthew 1:19). (Just: good, fair, honest, upstanding.)
When he refused to believe Mary’s story . . . he was still a just man.
He may have been angry . . . but he was not vindictive. He had no desire to punish or embarrass Mary. Matthew says that he had decided to put her away privately. He was going to nullify their betrothal and cancel the marriage.
Dissolving a betrothal did not require a writing of divorcement. Betrothal was very serious and it was a formal, legal agreement . . . but it was not on the same level as a formal marriage.
The Old Testament Law in Deuteronomy 24:1-4 described two actions that dissolved a formal relationship between a husband and wife – 1) the issuance of a writing of divorcement, and 2) a physical expulsion of the mate (putting away or sending away or casting from the house).
Men were often guilty of putting their wives away with no legal recourse to begin a new life. God’s law demanded that a legal paper be issued, completely dissolving the marriage as if it had never existed. With this document in her hand, the Law said that she could legally and morally remarry.
All that was required to dissolve a betrothal in Joseph’s time was a personal decision on his part to reject Mary as his intended. Matthew records that the just man made a personal decision not pursue any public punishment or recrimination upon Mary, but instead to simply and privately discontinue the relationship. He was within his right, perhaps, to castigate or embarrass Mary, but he was not that kind of man.
In Matthew 1:20-24 the gospel writer reports that the Angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and verified the condition and testimony of Mary.
20) But as he continued to think about what Mary had told him, the Angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream. The Angel said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to proceed with your marriage to Mary. Because the baby that she is carrying was conceived by God’s Holy Spirit.
21) And she is going to give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus (Savior):because he is going to save His people from their sins.
22) Now all this was done to fulfill the prophecy:
23) “Look! A virgin is going to conceive, and she will give birth to a son, and he will be Emmanuel, which means God with us.”
24) When Joseph awoke, he did exactly as the Angel of the Lord had told him: he took Mary as his wife.
Zacharias, Elizabeth, Mary, and now Joseph were brought into the miraculous loop in the birth of Jesus through the persistence, patience, and faithfulness of God, the Divine Planner.
No spoken word of Joseph is recorded in any of the Gospel accounts (Mary did all of the talking!). Evidently he was a man of action instead of many words. There is nothing in scripture that indicates that he ever doubted or questioned God or His orders as given through the heavenly Messenger or from within his own heart.
Joseph is depicted as a man who was never without faith in God.
When God asked him to have faith in young Mary . . . he was convinced to do so.
Once again the nativity story was in danger of being derailed . . . but the will of God and the plan of God proceeded.
